Uncomfortable: The “C” Word – CHANGE | A Year of Growth

Was scrolling through pictures I was “tagged in” the other day, and it legitimately made me stop what I was doing.

MBA Graduation 2017

It’s been over a year since I packed up my life (and Nina) and moved to Phoenix, just about a year that I’ve been single – I know right?, and I’ve been with Dansons #DreamJob for a little over a year now as well.
When I saw all those old pictures this moment of realization hit me like a frikin brick. Does that ever happen to you? You know something, but then it’s like oh snap! I REALLY understand it now.

LIFE changes – it is fluid. But my life has changed so much in this last year – I wouldn’t recognize the person I was a year ago.
The lack of confidence, being unsure of myself, my future or my career. I always wanted to be the life of the party, but internally – the past few years leading up to this last one – had been hard.
A brave face, for an insane world!

Some of my lights ❤

And of course, not all of it was bad, there are always rainbows if we look for them and people that are lights in our lives.
But I think about the way I felt a year ago, how low and dependent I was, how I had kind of become a shell of my former vibrant self.
And then I think about how much I have accomplished in this past year, and how proud I am to be the person I am today. Because THAT’S the challenge. Bettering yourself, everyday. Growing and learning from your mistakes, from your misjudgments.

This is kinda a brutally honest blog for me, pretty intense actually, because owning that version of me, and how I was acting, is hard. But that doesn’t define WHO I am as a whole.

I am not dependent. I am not sad or constantly searching to get out from under a cloud. No doubt I had a bit of depression, which probably didn’t help my self confidence, or my motivation (or lack thereof) either… But I am not the sum of those “actions”, none of those whats.

1st NPC competition | November 9th, 2018

I AM strong. I AM independent. I AM willing to make sacrifices in my life to get to where I want to be. I AM loyal (almost to a fault). I AM honest and respected by my peers.  I AM unapologetic about my drive and determination. That is WHO I am.

Who are you? Not what, but who?

One of the best questions I’ve ever been asked, and didn’t really have an immediate answer for was: to define my purpose.
Second best: How does your purpose relate to how you define yourself? To who you are?
Finding your why, is defining your purpose. Check out this book by Simon Sinek to get more in depth on the topic 🙂
(Side note: I loved my classmates in Grad School, that’s where these deep conversations stemmed from.)

This can be a lot to swallow, and a lot to wrap your head around. These are MASSIVE questions.
What truly is your purpose? And how does that help define who you are?
Take a few minutes and let that resonate. Don’t get anxiety if you can’t answer right away, these answers may take some time for you to truly figure out.

MBA Crew | Engagement Party

I thought I knew what my answer was – but over the last year I have further defined both of those answers and further defined WHO I am as an individual and why that is important to me.
Refining how you think about the world, and how you fit based on WHO you are – is a challenge to say the least. But it’s amazing that we are presented with this opportunity for growth every day! #OneStepAtATime

So, cheers to the girl I was a year ago – she was tough, although lost. But DOUBLE CHEERS to the woman I have grown into this past year – she is firm, she is confident, she knows what she wants, and she is strong in her resolve.
Last but certainly NOT least – cheers to the path you have taken, however winding it may have been, to get to where you are today.
And to the many more you may find yourself on in the future. ❤

Let’s get REAL here, because this was legit hard for me to write honestly and not censor myself.
Let’s get uncomfortable and start challenging ourselves to be better than we were yesterday.

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